A Year Without Rain

Can you feel me

When I think about you?

With every breath I take

Every minute

No matter what I do

My world is an empty place

Like I've been wandering the desert

For a thousand days

Don't know if it's a mirage

But I always see your face, baby

I'm missing you so much

Can't help it, I'm in love

A day without you 

is like a year without rain

I need you by my side

Don't know how I'll survive

A day without you 

is like a year without rain.

The stars are burning

I hear your voice in my mind 

Can't you hear me calling?

My heart is yearning

Like the ocean that's running dry

Catch me, I'm falling.

It's like the ground is crumbling underneath my feet

Won't you save me?

There's gonna be a monsoon when you get back to me, baby

So let this drought come to an end

And make this desert flower again

I need you here

I can't explain

But a day without you

Is like a year without rain

It's a world of wonder with you in my life

So hurry, baby, don't waste no more time

I need you here, I can't explain

But a day without you is like a year without rain, ai.. :""")

_Selena Gomez_

The Words That I Can't Say

"Say Something"


by: A Great Big World feat Christina Aguilera

Say something, I'm giving up on you
I'll be the one, if you want me to
Anywhere I would've followed you
Say something, I'm giving up on you
And I am feeling so small
It was over my head
I know nothing at all
And I will stumble and fall
I'm still learning to love
Just starting to crawl
Say something, I'm giving up on you
I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you
Anywhere I would've followed you
Say something, I'm giving up on you
And I will swallow my pride
You're the one that I love
And I'm saying goodbye
Say something, I'm giving up on you
And I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you
And anywhere I would've followed you
Say something, I'm giving up on you
Say something, I'm giving up on you
Say something... ai !!

Deep Feeling !

You know how much I love you? | The time will tell you later.

Because this feeling is not worth to be spoken | Not while I'm still not ready.

As a greeting can tarnish the heart | 'maksiat' will immerse myself.


I'm already in that hole feeling | Speak or silence is equally torturous.

But when we speak it is not only the torture but also leave the sin | Because we are not ready and to hide away this feeling could be harsh.

Who knows my future and your future? | Sometimes the stupidity take over my senses.

I think if I tell this feeling, it will make me peaceful | Whereas I knew it is the beginning of the disaster that led to the regret.

Then, perhaps silence is the best way | or will I make you some lyrics?

However I have no face | When I should start with 'maksiat'.

So, let's hide this feeling without expressed it | ‘till the time, I am able and worthy to carry on.

How much I love you? | You probably never knew.

-Reblog and translate Ust. Felix Siauw's writing. 

Sometimes Dreams Are Better Off Not Real !

Months have passed since we became close friends.

Every day I find I'm thinking of you,
Though no word from you that message sends.

And yet we share all other thoughts and feelings.

I cannot wait to tell you of my day,

And you give me the gist of all your dealings,

Which makes me hope we walk in the same way. Telling you this is opening a door.
That never can be closed again, and yet

I must, because I ache for something more,

Something that I must risk all to get.

I laughed at people still in love

Who trusted someone's word;

To make their happiness depend

On faith seemed quite absurd.

I lay alone and wonder-struck,

Sleepless in my bed,

Still numb, still dumb, still ice, ice cold,

Not knowing I was dead.

Sometimes dreams are better off not real.

Old yearnings drain away through open gates.

Regretfully I tell you how I feel,

Yet with wounds that time will have to heal.

Sometimes dreams are better off not real.

to realize that I have a lot of to do.

for my future.. for my parents.. for my education.

that want me to be a successful women without any pain in love. 

a classic love story

I have a classic love story about a girl who breaking her own heart. 

She meets someone. He likes a dream come true. 

They are get close. It's all great for awhile. 

Then someone stops trying. Talk less. 

Awkward conversations.

The drifting. No communication whatsoever. 

Memories start to fade. 

When it’s close enough he just let it go. 

Then that person she knows becomes that person she knew. Now she’s trying to fight the pain. 

That's all. 

Finished. 

That Crazy Thing Called Love

I haven’t done much writing lately, but so many questions and feeling that I have.

What is it about someone that makes another person let them into their life, even when their logical brain is telling them to watch out? Why do some (rare) people seem to possess that magical quality that makes you fall head over heels, flat on your face, and stupidly ignore all internal warning bells until further notice? How can you turn it off? How can people that SEEM right for you not be the ones that grab your heart, while the one that CLEARLY isn’t is the one that you stop everything for?

And how can I still feel so much? When I know he don’t feel at all. How can I still cry like it happened just the night before?

I wish there was a way to turn my feelings off. Get rid of my emotions. I need to hide my heart. It’s a simple notion. When I meet his eyes and enter past the sheath of attraction

He sees me. :)

For me and cups my flaws.

In his willingness to love me.

Anyway..

He's that guy.

Finally... ahahaha

I fall in love with broken souls, and bent perspectives,

Every time I see the sunset during my breaks

it makes me smile because today I have something to live for.

I fall in love with doubt, and infrequency,

Every time I see the way he move so softly.

The Moments I knew I was falling for him.

And I am like Cinderella.

I fall in love. I was prepared to give him everything. I dressed myself up, made me beautiful, did it all. I let myself fall in love too quickly. And like Cinderella, I have an expiration date. I only have so long before I will fall apart. I can’t wait forever for an answer. I just can’t ... I just can't to wait the right time until I am ready to the thing called "marriage" :')

such as me ..

Quite possible the worst feeling in the world, when you love someone but they don't love you back. It kind makes you feel like a creepy loser. And you tell yourself that you don't care, you were over with before you began, that this is pointless, but you can't help but think about them. And you know what? They're probably a total screwed you over, but you don't even care. One day in the far-off future, you'll wonder why you gave a heart about such a loser, but for now you're just going to have to hope that either they start to have feelings for you back or just hope and pray that you get over them, neither of which are going to happen.

It's the feeling of being completely, hopelessly, desperately in love with someone, all the while knowing that your feelings will never reach them.

It's contradictory in that you feel incredible because you love someone so much, but also at the same time you feel almost overwhelming despair because you will never know what it is like to hold them in your arms, or touch their face.

It can be nature- it causes such heartache, but you enjoy loving the person so much, you willingly let your heart go through the pain, so you can hold onto something- called "hope".

In any case, unrequited love is a very sad thing.

"Unrequited Love"-

Its like drowning but you just won't die.

It's no wonder that so many poets have written about unrequited love. For when their emotions have become so overwhelming, so inciting, or consuming, how could they not be driven to search for just the right words, images, and metaphors to express or better, release such intense feelings?

such as me .. who .. have .. a million poems .. for .. him.

Now Playing

Somehow, I really like this song... 

I've been playing with my lovely guitar...

when I felt alone...

Then to be happy ... 

I always play it...

just play it... 

........................

................

......

..

"when you love someone by Endah N Rhesa."

© I love you but it's not so easy to make you here with me

I wanna touch and hold you forever

But you're still in my dream

And I can't stand to wait ‘till nite is coming to my life

But I still have a time to break a silence

© When you love someone

Just be brave to say that you want him to be with you

When you hold your love

Don't ever let it go Or you will lose your chance

To make your dreams come true...

© I used to hide and watch you from a distance and i knew you realized

I was looking for a time to get closer at least to say... “hello”

And I can't stand to wait your love is coming to my life

And I never thought that I'm so strong

I stuck on you and wait so long

But when love comes it can't be wrong

© Don't ever give up just try and try to get what you want

Cause love will find the way....

Midnight in 2013

sometimes

as my sickness worsens each day

I want someone to love and take care of me

yet, I don't want them to know the depth of my pain

so, I go home alone

and cry myself to sleep in loneliness

because I am unable to live long and sturdy

still, I don't want anyone seeing me like ‘this'

but sometimes my lonely heart longs

for someone special to care

dying isn't something we want to do alone

yet pride keeps us from having anyone there

I searched for a ‘healthy' love

because love is what people need

recklessly, I reached elsewhere to find

the love I ever seek

in my ignorance and hurry

to find my inner peace

I desperately saw in another

what people needed to see in me...

....health, and hope, and life

instead of sickness and decline

I found in another

my wish came true, to hide my dying

my only wish is that someone would love and care for me

instead of this loneliness of dying alone.

room, midnight in 2013.

Empty !!

I’m breaking my own heart
Taking it too far down the lonely road
The very thing I've been the most afraid of
I've been doing it from the start, breaking my own heart 

in the December end 

Malam, Hujan, dan Senja

Ini tentang malam yang selalu menunggu datangnya hujan untuk menemaninya melewati waktu. Ini tentang malam yang telah dikhianati siang karena matahari selalu ada dilangitnya. Ini tentang kesetiaan malam yang menanti datangnya rembulan untuk sekedar memberikan kehangatan.

ini tentang malam, hujan dan senja..

Kala itu malam telah membunuh separuh kehidupan didalamnya dengan keheningan, sebelum hujan datang membawakan sedikit keriangan dengan suara derasnya air. Malam mengadu pada hujan tentang kecemburuannya pada pelangi, tentang rembulan yang tak pernah datang, tentang siang dan pagi yang kian membuatnya merasa menyendiri.

Kala itu malam telah memutuskan bahwa memang hujan yang selalu membawakan derai kehangatan dengan beribu airnya. 

Malam tidak sendirian lagi !.

Bermalam-malam, malam habiskan waktu malamnya dengan hujan yang terkadang menghiasinya dengan petir dan dingin. 

Tapi dengan begitu malam tidak sendirian lagi !.

Kala itu malam membuat sore iri karena tak bisa bantu menemani. Namun malam tak peduli karena baginya kini ada hujan yang akan membuatnya berdiri sendiri. 

Karena malam tidak sendirian lagi !.

Dan kala itu juga malam merasakan kesunyian yang perlahan menyakitinya. Hujan tak pernah datang. Malam sempat berfikir mungkin hujan marah padanya.

Bermalam-malam, malam menunggu datangnya hujan, namun hujan tak pernah datang. Malam putuskan untuk bertanya pada pelangi, kemana perginya hujan. pelangi bilang, mungkin hujan sedang mencari senja.

Ketika hujan menemukan senja, maka malam akan menangis dengan penuh penyesalan. Dan itu terjadi pada malam ini. Malam menangis. 

Karena kini malam sendirian lagi !.

Malam pun bertanya pada waktu..

Mengapa malam selalu berteman dengan kesunyian..

Mengapa tak ada rembulan yang menemaninya memecahkan keheningan..

Mengapa hujan masih memberikan kehangatan pada malam ketika hujan telah menemukan senja..

Mengapa siang mengkhianatinya karena matahari telah memberikan sinarnya..

Mengapa kesunyian membunuh malam secara perlahan..

dan waktupun menjawab, karena malam hanya membutuhkan waktu !. 
waktu untuk membuat malam belajar tentang keikhlasan, kesabaran, dan ketakwaan.

I Promise You

I'm Really Fine !

This is for the "i'm fine" girls

A Thousand Years.

I couldn't believe what I did. I was crying in the rain. it's so ashamed. for the reason that I don't understand. and listen to the song that makes me more miss the person who makes the excuses to cry in the night, it's something bad. I have to stop this feeling but.. *sigh* :'( it's like I have to shout this words ... 
"for a thousand years, I'll love you for a thousand more."  
I wish you'd listen closer to the song I play, 'cause the lyrics speak the words I fail to say. 

*now playing*

"A Thousand Years"

Heart beats fast
Colors and promises
How to be brave
How can I love when I'm afraid to fall
But watching you stand alone
All of my doubt suddenly goes away somehow

One step closer

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

Time stands still
Beauty in all she is
I will be brave
I will not let anything take away
What's standing in front of me
Every breath
Every hour has come to this

One step closer

I have died everyday waiting for you
Darling don't be afraid I have loved you
For a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

And all along I believed I would find you
Time has brought your heart to me
I have loved you for a thousand years
I'll love you for a thousand more

November 16, 2012

"Laugh when you can. Apologize when you should. And let go of what you can't change. Love deeply and forgive quickly. Take chances and give your everything. Life is too short to be anything but happy. You have to take the good with the bad. Love what you got. Always remember what you had. Forgive, but don't forget. Learn from your mistakes but never regret. The next time you fall in love, you have to fall for someone who will make you feel that loving him is the greatest decision you ever made and not just another mistake."

*Promise with beloved Dady*

"Hey You ! I'm Fine"

This list made me laugh because I'm guilty of using all of these. In fact, I got into an "argument" with my friend this morning and it ended with me saying "fine"... hahha :p

10-11-12

\(´▽`)/ 10-11-12 ! wow.. that's a beautiful date for wedding :p

We know, Marriage, is an important moment for everyone. Including me. After so long, I hope it's a sacred event to happen in my life. hihhi

I wanna get married but ... I'm afraid to fall in love (again). because *piiiiip *sensor* :p  

and when my friend asked me "Are you single?” 

I answered "NO, I'm in a long distance relationship!!” 

“Aww, where's he from?” 

“The FUTURE !" hihhi.. that's a ridiculous conversation. :p
but, in deep my whole heart I wish that I will get someone who I can act silly with, someone who treats me well and loves being with me and I want to love someone whose heart has been broken, so that he knows exactly how it feels and won't break mine *ouch :') 

and now, I'm just going to keep my heart as well as possible, so that it doesn't break (again). aamiin. 

( ˘ з˘)~♡ congratulations to someone who is getting married today

A Little Too Not Over You

 
It never crossed my mind at all.
It's what I tell myself.
What we had has come and gone.
You're better off with someone else.
It's for the best, I know it is.
But I see you.
Sometimes I try to hide
What I feel inside,
And I turn around.
You're with 'her' now.
I just can't figure it out.

*) Tell me why it's so hard to forget.
Don't remind me, I'm not over it.
Tell me why I can't seem to face the truth.
I'm just a little too not over you.
Not over you....

Memories, supposed to fade.
What's wrong with my heart?
Shake it off, let it go.
Didn't think it'd be this hard.
Should be strong, movin' on.
But I see you.
Sometimes I try to hide 
What I feel inside.
And I turn around,
You're with 'her' now.
I just can't figure it out.

*) 

Maybe I regret everything I said,
No way to take it all back, yeah...
Now I'm on my own..
How I let you go, I'll never understand.
I'll never understand, yeah..


*) Not Over You 

:: David Archuleta :: cardboardlove.com

DENGAR KISAH SEORANG GADIS YANG BARU MENGENAL CINTA

Hendak ku tuliskan sebuah kisah tentang seorang gadis yang baru mengenal cinta..

Dia mengenal dirinya jauh ketika orang lain telah memaparkan keelokkan wajahnya..

berbagai pujian klasik slalu terucap manis untuknya.. semasa kecil pun berbagai perstasi telah ia berikan untuk sebuah penghargaan kepada orang tuanya.. dan sejuta harapan pun telah berada di pundakya.. bahwa kelak.. ketika dia dewasa beban ini akan terasa ringan bila di pundaknya... dia mengenal persahabatan yang terikat oleh janji suci Ilahi.. dia mengenal manisnya persaudaraan yang di balut dengan kesungguhan iman... tapi dia belum mengenal akan permadani hati yang setiap orang pasti memilikinya.. walaupun sejuta orang menginginkan jadi mahkota cintanya.. tapi sejuta kali itu pula dia menolak..

Tapi suatu ketika.. dia menemukan seorang yang membuat hatinya berantakan.. membuat malam-malamnya di buat indah karena mimpinya.. membuat setiap pikirannya di habiskan hanya untuk bagaimana terlihat cantik di hadapannya.. membuat seluruh mimpinya yang telah ia buat bertahun2 telah tertutupi oleh manisnya sebuah senyuman yang diberikan untuknya.. membuat semua hijab yang telah ia bangun untuk melindunginya dari segala fitnah terlerai begitu saja.. membuat hari-harinnya penuh warna.. kadang gelisah.. manja.. bahagia.. bahkan merana...

tak bisa ku tuliskan lagi kisah tentang gadis itu.. karena sekarang mungkin ia tengah menangis..

menangis penuh haru.. mengharap saudara-saudarinya dulu memapahya kembali ke susana yang dulu pernah ia alami bersama yang penuh ceria.. tapi ternyata bukan hanya dia yang terjerat cinta semu.. beberapa saudaranya pun jatuh gugur di tengah perjalanan.. bahkan ada yang masih merasakan manis-manisnya.. dan berharap semua waktu itu tak berlalu..

Lalu bagaimana nasib gadis itu.. aku tak bisa ceritakan lebih lanjut.. karena mungkin sekarang dia sedang tergugu dalam kesendirian.. betapa beratnya perjuangan.. betapa sulitnya melewati seuah rintangan..

tapi kini.. yang aku tau.. dia adalah gadis cerdas.. dan kuat.. tak akan sebegitu mudahnya rela melepas keimanannya.. hingga mungkin sekarang ia akan bangkit lagi sendiri aku kira.. menatap panjang mentari yang masih terik di penghujung senja... berharap segala ampunan ia dapatkan oleh KekasihNya...

# itulah kisah yang bisa aku ceritakan kawan..

bahwa segala perjalanan itu tak semudah membalikkan telapak tangan..

mungkin akan banyak batu yang kau sandung... mungkin akan banyak bintang yang menerangi langkahmu..

hati-hati kawan.. jangan terpedaya oleh manisnya rupawan.. karena mungkin bisa saja kau tersandung seperti gadis itu.. tapi masa muda mu masih panjang.. teruslah berkarya... merajut mimpi dan tawa.. karena kita tau pelangi yang satukan kita.. :)