Deep Feeling !

You know how much I love you? | The time will tell you later.

Because this feeling is not worth to be spoken | Not while I'm still not ready.

As a greeting can tarnish the heart | 'maksiat' will immerse myself.


I'm already in that hole feeling | Speak or silence is equally torturous.

But when we speak it is not only the torture but also leave the sin | Because we are not ready and to hide away this feeling could be harsh.

Who knows my future and your future? | Sometimes the stupidity take over my senses.

I think if I tell this feeling, it will make me peaceful | Whereas I knew it is the beginning of the disaster that led to the regret.

Then, perhaps silence is the best way | or will I make you some lyrics?

However I have no face | When I should start with 'maksiat'.

So, let's hide this feeling without expressed it | ‘till the time, I am able and worthy to carry on.

How much I love you? | You probably never knew.

-Reblog and translate Ust. Felix Siauw's writing. 

When You ....

"When you feel lonely, recall how Adam (as) felt when he was sent to this earth alone.

When you can’t see any logic in what’s going on, and questions arise, recall Nūḥ (as) who built the biggest ship on dry land without questioning.

When you find your parents opposing you (in dīn), recall Ibrāhīm (as) who was thrown into a blazing fire by his father.

When you are hurt by your own, recall Yūsuf (as) who was betrayed by his own brothers.

When you are ill and your whole body cries with pain, recall Ayyūb (as) who was so sick that insects would eat from his sick decaying body.

When you’re stuck, and cannot find a way out, recall Yūnus (as) who was stuck inside the belly of a whale.

When you’re mocked, abused, and taunted by your own, just because you adopted dīn over dunyā, recall Muḥammad (saw) who faced much worse.”

Sometimes Dreams Are Better Off Not Real !

Months have passed since we became close friends.

Every day I find I'm thinking of you,
Though no word from you that message sends.

And yet we share all other thoughts and feelings.

I cannot wait to tell you of my day,

And you give me the gist of all your dealings,

Which makes me hope we walk in the same way. Telling you this is opening a door.
That never can be closed again, and yet

I must, because I ache for something more,

Something that I must risk all to get.

I laughed at people still in love

Who trusted someone's word;

To make their happiness depend

On faith seemed quite absurd.

I lay alone and wonder-struck,

Sleepless in my bed,

Still numb, still dumb, still ice, ice cold,

Not knowing I was dead.

Sometimes dreams are better off not real.

Old yearnings drain away through open gates.

Regretfully I tell you how I feel,

Yet with wounds that time will have to heal.

Sometimes dreams are better off not real.

to realize that I have a lot of to do.

for my future.. for my parents.. for my education.

that want me to be a successful women without any pain in love. 

a classic love story

I have a classic love story about a girl who breaking her own heart. 

She meets someone. He likes a dream come true. 

They are get close. It's all great for awhile. 

Then someone stops trying. Talk less. 

Awkward conversations.

The drifting. No communication whatsoever. 

Memories start to fade. 

When it’s close enough he just let it go. 

Then that person she knows becomes that person she knew. Now she’s trying to fight the pain. 

That's all. 

Finished. 

Purple Orchid